Watching The Bachelorette has cleared up a couple things for me: there may be no good people left in this world, and epicaricacy is America’s national pastime. I’m sure plenty are sounding out epicaricacy at this very moment as they try to connect the dots between this cumbersome word and a show where women date a litany of men in their search for love.
When wildfires surge in the mountains across the state you feel guilty because you lather your dying yard with water hoping the green hue will return. Your neighbors don’t wave to you because of this. The neighbors search through the recycling bins of every house in the neighborhood. They wear sandals made out of recycled rubber and pineapple leaf fibers.
There Is A Car For Sale. For a month a Nissan Rogue has been parked in my Mom’s driveway. It’s a white SUV covered in a layer of dirt. The sun has begun to bleach the paint and spots of rust are growing along the brake pads. Technically, it’s only been in two accidents but…
Milestones I’m starting to celebrate milestones I’ve never thought of before and have no way of tracking, ones that happen and are forgotten about like some random Tuesday in March. Last week I’m certain that I ran over my one thousandth pothole on the way home from work and two days ago I was asked if…
Mostly everyone is a horrible person in some way or another. It doesn’t really matter in the minutes leading up to midnight on New Year’s Eve whether one recognizes this or not, and especially when they manage to wake up sometime during the afternoon the next day, vowing to not drink for a month or hold themselves to some sort of challenge that will ultimately lead to their demise.
Netflix’s live adaptation of the beloved anime Cowboy Bebop needs to stay true to the original, but doing so would refuse to adhere to the present times.
With glazed eyes, frozen and locked on to the well-oiled abs of the men on the TV, Mom announced there were frozen slabs of macaroni in the freezer. That’s dinner.
A Child In Walmart Helped Me Understand The Obsession—And Monetization—Of The Average Fortnite Gamer More often than not when I wake up these days I feel old. My back aches as if I have been doing anything to solicit the singe of pain that gravitates around the base of my spine; the alcohol I…
When I told my Mom I was going to see The Suicide Squad, she asked why I was going to see a movie that was released five years ago. To clarify, she dabbles in the world of superhero movies, which means she’s not going out of her way to watch every single release churned out by Marvel or Warner Bros., but knows enough to stay in the loop.
The King Of Social Media Is Here To Stay. Go out to a bar and you won’t be able to swing a bat without hitting someone who’s a fan of Barstool Sports. A lot of people are. I am. I’m pretty sure my Grandma has fallen down a rabbit hole of viral videos corralled by…
