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I Accidentally Committed Piracy

June 19, 2023Mac LyonsArticles, Reviews

I’m sure this comes as no surprise but I am not a technologically-savvy person. Setting up my own internet and remembering the multiple variations of the same password often proves difficult for me. If I had the choice, I would use a flip phone. I’d receive everything through the mail and pay my bills via banker’s check. Maybe I’m old school and maybe there’s a part of myself that refuses to adapt to the times. The world is all tech. It’s fast moving and often seems unable to slow down.

Rockies And Tacos: A History

June 16, 2023Mac LyonsSports

It’s time we talk about tacos. I’ve wanted to dive into this subject matter for some time now, but seeing as Denver sports are finding success and championships often in the recent decade, it feels out of place to discuss anything in relation to the Rockies.

The Ten-Year Anniversary Of This Is The End

June 12, 2023Mac LyonsReviews

Ten years ago I saw This Is The End for the first time. For those who lived a sheltered life, this was a creation from Seth Rogen and Evan Goldberg that saw nearly everyone who was a part of Knocked Up, The 40-Year-Old Virgin, and Pineapple Express all congregate onto one set, to make a completely outlandish and meta-comedy about themselves and how their supposed friend group would handle a biblical apocalypse.

Ten Lessons From Raiders Of The Lost Ark

May 20, 2023Mac LyonsFiction

It’s amazing. Harrison Ford, Nazis, reunited love, a car chase that goes on forever and the release of a godly power no man is capable of utilizing. I don’t know what else to say. It brings me back up when the going gets tough.

I Watched Bupkis

May 7, 2023Mac LyonsReviews

The lives of celebrities often feel comparable to a show. Maybe it’s not a good show, but it’s one of those shows people can’t seem to look away from, like seeing a train set ablaze, steaming down the tracks with an incapacitated conductor, heading right towards a nursery, a disaster in the making. The masses seem to love this, the ingesting of drama within famous lives.

Some Appreciation For The Cold Opening Day

March 30, 2023Mac LyonsArticles, Sports

It’s beautiful. Earth is not yet ready for baseball but baseball doesn’t care. That’s mainly because there’s a ridiculous 162 games that need to be played, and if we don’t start when a majority of the states are still escaping from winter’s grip, then things just won’t add up. So, America’s pastime is forced to endure the elements.

Tales Of A Part-Time Employee

February 1, 2023Mac LyonsArticles

I don’t talk about where I work. Anyone who has worked as a part-time employee—call it hourly, retail, lackey, regardless of the term it’s a job where you’re a small piece of the bigger machine—can resonate with this to a certain extent. Sometimes the reluctance to speak about work stems from the number of years you’ve wilted away in the same position or the title you technically have but refuse to acknowledge.

It’s Perfectly Normal To See A Movie By Yourself (Or, The Review of Puss In Boots: The Last Wish)

January 11, 2023Mac LyonsReviews

I’d like to preface this piece by saying that a lot of people do a lot of weird things, and if the epitome of my weirdness is going to the movies by myself—and if the subscript to that specific weirdness is going alone to see an animated movie as a 25-year-old—then I’d say it’s a perfectly normal activity to do.

Venmo’s Social Currency

December 3, 2022Mac LyonsArticles

There’s boredom and then there’s the level of boredom someone reaches when they begin to swipe through their Venmo feed. Certainly it’s not a level of desperation that would lead them to Facebook, the wasteland reserved for everyone’s aunts and uncles and parents to entertain themselves with.

Rambo Has Feelings Too

October 21, 2022Mac LyonsReviews

It feels like I should’ve seen this a long time ago. I can imagine a thirteen-year-old me stuck at home during winter break with nothing to do other than glue my eyes to a television screen and my Dad—in his ever obsession with war movies and any type of military-related media—would turn on First Blood so we could watch Sly Stallone use his Green Beret skills to pick off hapless, spiteful, and overwhelmed deputies one by one in the Washington wilderness.